The CULTURE OF ENCOUNTER, between the culture of conflict and the culture of agreement

 

Dialogue and encounter form part of the scope of the methodology, in order to "get" the "best version" of each person, thus enhancing their gifts. It is based mainly on the concept that social coexistence must be taken care of. For this we have to be very careful with the need for "active listening", a fundamental skill in mediation, which places us in the middle in the "we" mode. That is why, far from being a concept that Pope Francis made fashionable when in his speech before the Diplomatic Corps that was being accredited to the Holy See, in January 2020, he said: "It is necessary that politicians make an effort to reestablish a culture of dialogue" in clear reference to the need for dialogue and encounter, although each one has their right to be assertive

That is why what we have called "culture of encounter" means the transition that can occur between two cultures: that of conflict and that of agreement. We can only reach an agreement if we have achieved a meeting. a new way of acting in relation to “the others” in a conflict situation.

The "culture of encounter" supposes the challenge of getting out of our comfort zone and renewing the possibility of understanding the "other" who may have his part in the right, even if I do not share it.

It is... pure mediation, since it begins by seeing and assuming that the others not only have their share of responsibility for the problem, but that they are part of the solution and only in this way can we build the "bridge of constructive dialogue". It is not easy to see, but, if we remove our positions and personal interests, we both find ourselves in the same place: the need to manage the problem in the best possible way, that is the meeting place.

Therefore, allow me to affirm that if there are no borders, limits, to what we believe, we will be able to meet and thanks to you mediator, I can assume two attitudes: look at what is happening without wanting to understand and feel sorry for the difficulty of a solution , or her search, or go for her, reinforced, because the other party validated, before whoever helps us, the possibility of the encounter.

It is not comfortable, because it requires an attitude, but concepts such as "subsidiarity" and "solidarity" are worked on, lived in a practical way, so that they are not just concepts... This is the culture of encounter!

We mediators need a true "meeting", which allows us to debate, arguing with those we cannot see, convinced of what we think, but open to having the sensitivity to listen and only thanks to them we understand the reality, the problem and that proposals to make to solve it.

Nothing easy!, and really much more difficult than debating in court, with turns to speak and conclusions to our allegations... but without the power of decision to those who are really suffering from the conflict.

The "culture of encounter" is not an easy task, much less for Catholics locked in their own references, locked in themselves, living by their own concepts and not by the original message, which is the message of Jesus Christ written in the Gospels.

And I end as I began, with another quote from Pope Francis who said in his speech to which I referred at the beginning:

“This meeting offers me the opportunity to express appreciation for the efforts that have been made, over the last decades, to end armed violence and find paths to reconciliation. In the last year, progress has certainly been made in a particular way; the steps taken give rise to hope, in the conviction that the search for peace is a task that is always open, a task that does not let up and that requires the commitment of all

This work asks us not to falter in the effort to build the unity of the nation and, despite the obstacles, differences and different approaches on how to achieve peaceful coexistence, to persist in the fight to promote the CULTURE OF ENCOUNTER, which requires place at the center of all political, social and economic action, the human person, his lofty dignity, and respect for the common good»

Let's learn from the Culture of Encounter.